Christmas Time is Here

As soon as we grabbed a cart for some night before Thanksgiving groceries, I thought of my previous post predicting the Freeman household festive day. It wasn't until we got to the back of the store that it made me laugh. I can't believe it took me a month away from home and a short year since our last Thanksgiving to remember that nothing is ever as expected, and that in itself should be expected.

1. Threat of no turkey on Thanksgiving

Mom quickly found the frozen turkey section, but we wanted fresh turkey. Not to worry though, there is always plenty of fresh turkey upon request. I began weaving quickly between browsing, chatting, space prohibiting bodies as I tried to keep sight of the dark-haired woman in a wool sweater on a mission for turkey. When I caught up my mother was hollering hello to a young man behind the meat counter. I got there just in time to see him shake his head in response to her question. No more fresh turkeys.

2. Back-up breakfast

Moving on toward breakfast items, we threw orange rolls in the cart, which are often our holiday treat. Mmm I couldn't wait to wake up and watch the parade while sipping coffee and enjoying a warm roll. Of course I woke up rather to the sounds of Mom's "oh dear..Bruce come look at this". I came downstairs to a scene imagined. I was offered coffee and breakfast was in the oven. But, as we deeply inhaled, the smell of goodness was missing. The expiration date: 2010.

3. 12 delectable rolls..of all shapes and sizes

My time in the kitchen had arrived as I helped my dear mother make rolls. Yet to put on her apron we wore flour instead(and as I later discovered, some dough in my hair). Reaching over each other we used the dough as our clay for craftsmanship.

4. finely chopped celery and onions for the stuffing.

I was then put in charge of chopping celery. Of course I immediately chopped my finger instead, which is when I called in back-up. Dad stood to my left holding my pinky wrapped in towels repeating how crucial it is to apply pressure. His phone rang and he left my side, leaving me with one hand in the air and the other fearlessly chopping, while tears ran down my face caused by staring into the depths of an onion.

5. "I'm thankful for Kathryn because...umm..."

Since our table seated so few this year, we initiated a new tradition. While dads may carve the turkey, moms are in charge of all the Thanksgiving goodness. So my mother stepped up once more and went around the table and said why she was thankful for all of us. She started with me.

In the end, Mom found us turkey, offered cranberry bread for breakfast, remembered the rolls in the oven in the knick of time, took the knife away from me, and kindly fought to find words to describe me. My day began in jeans, transitioned to elastic/stretch, and ended with oversized flannel pants. This indicates that the Freemans pulled off another deliciously traditional Thanksgiving, in a typical untraditional manner.

Christmas Time is (almost) Here

It's starting to get chilly and all of the cafes and bakeries are playing Michael Bublé's holiday specials. Tomorrow is Thanksgiving and in my household that officially kicks off the Christmas spirit. The music will resonate through the living room cupboard, Willie Mac will roam the outdoors for thrown out turkey scraps and Teena will follow the perimeter of the counters for the same sort of fallen extras. Mom will undoubtedly slip into Grandma's elegant flower apron while Dad sits on the kitchen floor reading the paper. I'm sure Gramma will still be putting the finishing touches on her pumpkin pies. This year I have been invited into the kitchen. I too will wear an apron and smell for the perfection of the sweet potatoes and stuffing. Happy Thanksgiving.

A Place to Dream

It feels so great to light my candles, get swallowed by the soft glow of lamps, and curl up at my desk. I see blurred outlines in my peripheral, but the clear image in front of me promises to patiently remain a pure white page with one blinking cursor until I decide to fill it with the black letters that are swimming around my mind. For a long time I've wondered why it is that so often when I open my journal or place my fingers on the keyboard I automatically purge feelings about relationships, or truthfully, Chris. For awhile I resented that he filled so many of my recorded memories, but I realized that this sliver of time is when i allow myself to ignore the real world and be true. The real me is a girl that dreams past the stars and the truth is I don't desire reality, because there's always the greatness of what is beyond our realms of comprehension. For awhile Chris was part of my dream. Our future was something that was so close to my finger tips that it made me stand really tall so I could try and reach it. Now, keeping him away forever is a thought that brings the same type of hope. I guess I don't need to apologize for all of this time spent on that single subject. It isn't that I'm caught up in one short breath of time at all, it's that I'm giving myself these few moments to reach for so many more.

Our Friend(ly) Ghost

It remains a surprise to me that the 3 of us didn't wake up in 1 twin bed this morning. After a series of events last night, Rachel established the inevitable conclusion that "the Ark" (our house) has a ghost. We discovered in the same night that Alexis is VERY afraid of any ghostly thoughts. They left me alone so I screamed, which made them scream, which made Alexis run into the desk, which made the grape juice spill, which caused me to run through something wet, which made me scream again because we thought the ghost did it, which ended up with all 3 of us in Alexis' bed. She called a boy, who didn't understand, which was followed by some more screaming as a plastic bag made ghost-like sounds from the fan swooshing by. Once again, homework was put low on the priority list, as my roomies and I moved in a pack for the remainder of the evening.

I'm BACK

Alright here we go. I have spent the last year loving, laughing, crying, worrying, dreaming, texting, calling, and giving into a relationship that left me here. Surprisingly, this is a great place to be. I'll spare you the self-pity moments for now and say that now I cry less than when I was with him. I have had one constant hope since I was dumped via phone call that I have yet to share. My sister told me in the summer that I was gone. The independent, happy, carefree little sister she knew was somewhere lost in a new world of stresses. I stood on my front porch with the phone held to my ear and could only agree. I did nothing about this because I still found myself completely wrapped up in his world. He pushed me out of his world and I didn't want to leave, but I quickly found the exit and realized I was on the other side of the door. I hoped and hoped 3 people in particular could see this. First, my mom. She deserves to have a happy daughter and she alone was enough reason for me to smile and mean it. The second person was my sister. I craved for her to see a better side of her little sister to come back. Hearing those words would reassure me in my weak moments that I'm better now. She brought this subject up last night and that allowed me to see him today and honestly tell him I'm loving life. Of course I must include Rachel. I can be a real friend to her now. I don't have to ask her to understand why I'm leaving every time I walk out the door and I don't have to fill her time with pointless boy stories. I get to make girly memories without a hint of Chris for the first time since I've been at Truman. I'm starting over and God has answered years of prayer. He has ripped another guy out of my life and didn't make me be the one to make the decision to say goodbye.

Title, etc.

Throughout the past couple weeks, I have daily declared a new blog title. My sister and I constantly discuss our "next story" for blogging purposes. There was the time I walked along a highway to give an assumably homeless man food, the $1.25 movie night with a missing child found by his dancing light-up shoes that created his trail throughout the theatre, or the game of cornhole that left my hamstring sore for days. My adventures have lead to downtown Raleigh where I may have become part of a bridal party in the background of photographs and into the heart of downtown Fuquay-Verena where I watched my sister correct inconsiderate lady. I chased a deer once and recited Eminem with a 30 year old man. Then there was last night, the night my big sister showed me how to break the law.

We started out extremely innocent. An afternoon at the pool with some friends was at the top of our agenda. A few incidents later and the pool was closed for the afternoon. We gave up on our tan and accepted a day of walking downtown, but one thing couldn't be changed. We needed grilled chicken. The grills were locked in with the pool. Not only were signs bolted into the fence informing us of the closed pool, there was literally a chain to prevent entrance. I laughed in the face of the chain.

January 12, 2012

I just found this blog that I never finished. The story ended with a couple broken signs, priceless photos, and grilled chicken. Stumbling across a little piece of North Carolina was exactly what I needed tonight. I miss that sunshine.

100+

Oh my goodness. My dear friends I do apologize. I have completely failed over the past few months to let the endless realm of cyber space see the most secret corners of my life. Whether you be 1 reader or 10, inquiring to know me more or out of sheer boredom, I have so much to tell you! Last time we chatted I wasn't the happiest of souls. Since then I have moved into a few different places, started a new relationship with the same guy and continued to drink fattening drinks from the one and only Starbucks...all over the country.

Quick Christopher update. To put it simply, he makes me happy. We are just shy of 2,000 miles apart for the summer so there hasn't been any dancing in Walgreens or holding hands lately, but I'm holding onto the belief that this can make us stronger. He has tried so hard to communicate with my dreamlike and removed-from-reality soul and I am counting down the days to July 7th when I will pick him up at the airport for a long (but too short) weekend!

Buuuut, I don't want to count to0 quickly, because if I keep my eyes on that road, I'll forget to look around and see what's passing by me now. I registered for my sophomore year as a college student, finished by freshman year, moved back home, road a train by myself for the first time, moved into my duplex for next year, then packed up the car and started my most recent adventure...1,000 mile road trip with dad.

The first story he told was of our floating car. My dad has a strange obsession with the mechanics close to our house. He takes our cars there at the faintest of worry. My bags were packed at the front door and I had already given Gramma goodbye hugs when I got the phone call. Dad was crossing the bridge and on his was to the shop because of a "steering problem" that was too in depth to discuss. I translated this into meaning he didn't understand what the gentleman told him on the phone so I simply frowned and waited by my bags without asking questions. I made fun of his worries later and that's when we started "floating". "Sometimes when you turn corners," he explained, "there is somewhat of a floating sensation". "Oh no!" I exclaimed. "Are we going to grow wings??" He didn't appreciate my sarcasm. My dad, my hero. Thanks to him I can rest assured that my engine will stay safely on the highway and I don't have to worry about floating. Other cars might want to watch out for that though. Newest technology folks, flying cars. At this point I offered to drive, half for our safety, half so I could turn up the music and feel the wind in hair. He surprisingly said I could when I wanted, but I decided a nap would first be necessary. This time I was the one being mocked. Apparently sleeping 10 minutes into an adventure is unacceptable behavior. For the next 2 days I begged to drive, to which I received negative responses. The only times he agreed, he saw my head on my pillow and knew I wouldn't take the responsibility of hurling our Avalon down the interstate in my sleepy state. We had at least a dozen potty breaks, to which I requested 1, explored downtown Louisville (where dad questioned a local in a curious and somewhat oblivious tone about the University of Louisville being located in Louisville), stopped for a sign that read "scenic view", and compared yahoo maps, mapquest directions, and the garmin... none of which were comparable. It was a long, but worthwhile trip as now I get the pleasure of drinking coffee and blogging in a new state. It's a hot one in North Carolina, feels like 100+ and I won't complain for a second. I've been exploring all day and tomorrow will arrive at my second day at MDCC where I am interning for the summer.

I have so many things to look forward to, but I must be careful not to hit fast forward. I have goals this summer, which I look forward to discussing with you next time. I am living with my best friend and her husband and taking every opportunity to be grateful for where I am in this very moment. Well, actually, at this very moment this chair is getting a little uncomfortable. Perhaps it's a sign I should bid you farewell. I would like to leave you with one more thought. My word this summer is "understand(ing)". It is filling my prayers, curiosity, and post-it notes. If I can grasp that word and make it a part of my character, if I can truly understand, I would be a much more pleasant person to many pleasant and not-so-pleasant people.

Goodbye friends, the pleasure has been mine.